Lived Experience: Empathy & Therapeutic Approach
In this article, we will explore some of my professional and personal experiences that helped develop me as a therapist today. These experiences have helped develop my empathy and therapeutic approach.
Depression, Anxiety, & Mental Illness
Growing up in a household with someone struggling with mental illness can present numerous challenges. My father struggled for my entire life with Bipolar disorder that was left unmanaged. At a young age I had to manage the uncertainty of my father’s behavior and his uncontrollable depression, mood swings, and anxiety. Part of the issue, when a family member's mental health is left unmanaged is that others health can be put on the back-burner. Soon after my father’s passing we discovered that my mother had been living with undiagnosed renal failure and was fearful to express her symptoms due to my father’s strong personality, fear of doctors, and his inability to cope. These experiences have shaped how I deal with my own anxiety and how I work with clients with similar back stories.
Grief Counseling
I worked as a social worker and therapist for 11 years supporting hospice patients in Pennsylvania (NE Philadelphia), New Mexico, and Colorado. During my grief counseling sessions with my client/patient we would explore the importance of dying with dignity and do a full life review. During these sessions so many other topics and challenges would arise such as depression, anxiety, money management, addiction, family and marital conflict, past trauma, etc. Personally, I have had to deal with dealing with my own grief when I lost both of my parents, my favorite uncle, and my 4 year old dog within a 12 month period. These experiences forced me to really understand and develop myself personally and professionally as a therapist.
Trauma & PTSD
Trauma comes in many forms and can result in PTSD. As an intern with the VA, I worked with many veterans coming back from the OEF (Operation Enduring Freedom - Afghanistan war) and OIF (Operation Iraqi Freedom - Iraq War) as well other veterans from other time periods. As a young social worker and therapist I had to learn quickly and assist these clients in coping with their trauma as they were faced with transitioning back to civilian life and cope with suicidal ideations, drug addictions, family conflict.
Medical treatment can also develop into medical trauma and PTSD. My wife lives with a chronic hereditary bone disorder, which requires orthopedic surgeries and similar treatments. To date, she has had over 20 surgeries (on every major bone group) since the age of twelve. Although these surgeries and treatments have helped provide her a better quality of life it comes with a lot of trauma and PTSD that we are working through on a daily basis. Through my efforts and our support system she has been able to resolve and live with her trauma, without it affecting her quality of life.
Chronic Pain & Illness
When working with hospice patients I got to see and hear how their chronic pain and illness affected their mental health and quality of life. Working with my wife who lives with chronic pain and illness we have explored coping techniques that have helped her have a better quality life and manage her pain.
Marriage & Relationship Issues
My wife and I have been together for 18 and a half years and have been through many common situations as outlined in this article that have tested our relationship. In our personal life and through our challenges we use a lot of the therapeutic approaches that have developed over the years and they have allowed us to be open and grow together as a robust team.
